31st March 2020. Working from home, David’s Diary Entry


Lockdown Holidays

We must be the only people in the UK who have had to take a week’s holiday when most of the rest of the country gets a free one.  For M it was a case of take the last of your hols before the new ones start in April or lose them.

Despite the sunshine I have to say I am already fed up of our lockdown holiday.  For some reason M, has taken over the hoovering. Granted I tend to do a half arsed job, but she has gone completely over the top.

No sooner do I get sat down in front of the TV than she is there telling me to lift my feet up. I have lifted them up so many times my stomach muscles feel like I have been to the gym. Sadly my six pack will be hidden under the extra two stone I will put on over the next few weeks. Still at least it’s a bit of exercise.

It really does annoy me though. hoovering has always been my domain and with her taking over, it means I no longer have an excuse for a cuppa and a biscuit afterwards. Another bit of freedom gone. I really can’t wait for this to be over.

Rather worryingly we are now at the stage of saying things like “someone has left a mess on the kitchen worktop”, or “someone has eaten all the biscuits”? Seeing as there are only 2 of us here, it seems to be a polite form of argument to me. Still it could be worse and I will only start to worry, if she replaces the “someone” with TW@T, or designs a patio with a large hole under it!

In general today has been a bit stressful and started off badly.  I was just about to get out of bed and while sitting up just happened to say my throat was a bit dry. I meant because I had probably been snoring, but I did not get to expand on that.

Quick as a flash M had me on my back and began wrestling my mouth open to have a look. That’s the trouble with marrying country lasses who know how to handle sheep, they are way too handy at tipping you over for a checkup.  Much as she would have done with an old ewe she expertly, and I have to say rather roughly forced my mouth open, examined me and then released me. It's a good job I didn't say I had a temperature that's for sure!

As the house now permanently looks like we are expecting friends round I made myself a cuppa and retreated to my shed for some peace. I did of course make sure I left a ring of tea on the kitchen worktop just out of badness. As you would expect such an act of wanton annoyance was repaid by finding the half packet of biscuits I had smuggled out and hidden here had partly been eaten my mice.  I was sorely tempted to just eat the good ones, but that was cut short by M arriving.

All she said was “grass cutter”. I said “sorted, bad connection” and off she went. I think she is suspicious though. Not to worry I have a plan to get around her by offering to do the shopping... well I am out of treats really but it gets me in her good books to offer.

No Celebrity Antiques Road Trip tonight, instead I booked a slot at 9.00pm to watch Forged in Fire. Moira watched it too and loves it – she is talking about us getting a forge so things are looking up as I would never have dared put in a request for one.
D

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